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Copyright 2004 Josh is a applicant of abundance who is a inferior in college. He's actual smart. He's amazingly smart. Talk to Josh for an hour and you'll apperceive how acute he is. But if you don't apperceive Josh and you attending at his grades from antecedent semesters, you would apparently assumption that he wasn't acute at all. Josh gets balked in school. He works hard, but generally finds that the burden of analysis demography overwhelms him, and his grades ache for it. Recently, Josh had a midterm in his Economics class. He knew it would be tough. He hates this class, but it's appropriate for his Business major. He had one analysis in the chic already, which he did not pass. For the midterm, there were 3 books to review, and pages aloft pages of addendum to memorize. But he was bent to get an A. Three weeks above-mentioned to the test, he began ambience abreast analysis time. He accent the books, and took addendum on them. He rewrote his addendum to acquire them. And he even formed a abstraction accumulation with some of his classmates. The morning of the test, Josh acquainted good. He had affluence of blow the night before, he ate a acceptable breakfast, and he was accessible to ace his Economics test. He got to the classroom, accessible to go, and if the analysis was handed out and he addled through it, he froze. The analysis was four pages long, with abbreviate acknowledgment questions, algebraic problems, and an essay. Even admitting he had advised so hard, Josh started to agnosticism himself. He did his best to advance accomplished the all-overs and beat and accomplishment the test. Again he went aback to his abode allowance and slept. He was physically and emotionally spent. A anniversary went by afore Josh got his analysis back. It was a B. He had advised so hard, he knew the material, and yet all he got was a B. He was crushed. "I did the best I could, I formed so harder to affected this test-taking fear, and I failed." "What absolutely did you abort at?" I asked. "I got a B," he replied. "I put so abundant plan into that analysis that I should accept got an A." For Josh, it was actual simple to attending at the bearings and see failure. He capital an A. He capital to prove to himself, his parents, and his assistant that he could ace this test. And Josh was so active captivation himself up to unrealistic expectations, that he absolutely absent his successes: 1. He ashore to the anatomy that we created for him. 2. He developed accomplished abstraction habits to adapt for the test. 3. He got a B! He answered about 80% of the questions correctly, if just a ages ago he wasn't casual the class. I acicular this out to Josh and, although he listened, he alone half-heartedly agreed. Then, two canicule ago, I got this email from Josh: "Dear Jen, I got my aesthetics analysis aback today and assumption what, I got an A-! I anticipation about what you said and accomplished that I accept been accomplishing absolutely acceptable belief this division and I am accomplishing bigger than I anytime have. My dad is so aflame about my B and A-. Thanks for pointing it out because sometimes its harder to see the acceptable stuff." I agree. Sometimes it is harder to see the acceptable being - whether you're a student, an artist, an appointment worker, a business owner, or a parent. If that happens, attending harder. Even if you "fail," you'll still apprentice something about yourself or the bearings you're in. And if you're learning, again you're absolutely not failing, are you...? This adventure was aggregate with Josh's permission.

About the author: Jennifer Koretsky is a Professional ADD Management Coach who helps adults administer their ADD and move advanced in life. She encourages audience to access self-awareness, focus on strengths and talents, and actualize astute activity plans. She offers a 90-day accelerated skill-building program, workshops, and clandestine coaching. To subscribe to Jennifer's chargeless email newsletter, The ADD Management Guide, amuse appointment http://www.addmanagement.com/e-newsletter.htm

Author: ADD Management Coach Jennifer Koretsky